Overcoming Bullying

By Alex Aryaan

Member, Board of Directors

Bullying is a pervasive issue that affects many youths and adults.  It is not reserved just for kids in school:  bullying may be one of the most critical antagonists in the story of good sportsmanship because it is the antithesis of following the golden rule.  As someone who has personally experienced bullying, I understand the impact it can have on one's self-esteem and overall well-being.
 
Growing up in a Chicago suburb, I felt I was surrounded by a concoction of affluence and arrogance.  Many of my peers came from privileged backgrounds and often used their status to belittle others.  Not only did I contrast because I came from a middle-class family, but I was the only non-athlete in a family of sports enthusiasts:  my mom was a former cheerleader; my dad was a former football player; one sister was a soccer player and cheerleader; another sister was a softball player; and my brother was a football player.  My interest in the arts contributed to the experience of feeling isolated in an environment where bullying felt corrosive, leaving me to find solace in the seclusion of my studies and at libraries.  However, this took a significant toll on my confidence and made me dread going to school each morning.  Ultimately, I ended up transferring schools my junior year because I had not yet developed essential skills such as emotional resilience, conflict resolution, or effective coping strategies.
 
Today, over ten years later, I have finally learned the power of positive reinforcement, problem solving, boundaries, empathy, and respect thanks to my experience in the workplace.  The value of good teamwork, collective effort, and sportsmanship demonstrates that in life, as in sports, how we treat others truly matters:  the workplace (which, in theory, is the adult version of school) runs much smoother if we are encouraged to support one another, celebrate each other's successes, and lift each other up during tough times.  This environment of mutual respect and encouragement was a stark contrast to the bullying I faced in high school.  How ironic (but not surprising) that this dynamic mirrors the formula that helps breed success in sports!
 
Overcoming bullying, both on and off the sports field, is not easy, but with the right support and environment, it is possible.  In fact, sports can play a pivotal role in the process of eliminating bullying, providing a safe space for children to grow, learn, and mature.  Unfortunately, according to recent data from Jersey Watch, the sports participation rates for youth ages 6-17 declined by 6% between 2019 and 2022, translating to 1.2 million fewer youth regularly playing team sports within this age group​​​​.  Also, around 70% of kids in the USA stop playing organized sports by age 13, citing reasons such as burnout, pressure from overly competitive parents, ineffective coaching, or simply that the sports are no longer fun​​​.  As such, using youth sports as a catalyst to overcome bullying becomes more and more rare when the number of participating kids declines this rapidly.
 
As the entity of sports has been said to mirror life, it’s no surprise that bullying has the potential to be the same destructive force in both sports and life.  However, it becomes even more sad when bullying in sports negates the power that participation in sports might have to help overcome bullying in life!  Such a phenomenon highlights how imperative it is that we at least reverse the trend to end bullying in sports; perhaps fighting that good fight will result in a move to end bullying overall.